Monkey see, monkey do... not anymore!

Umno must change before the people pass a "death sentence" on it, Home Minister and party supreme council member Syed Hamid Albar told Bernama.

He said change was timely as the party's image had been badly tarnished by cases involving members detained for alleged corruption by the Malaysian Anti-Corruption Commission (MACC).

"Embracing change and cleaning up the party must be discussed by the party's top leaders with members.

"Everyone, including the president and supreme council members must take responsibility so that our party is not given the death sentence," he prophetically cautioned.

But I think there isn’t much time to revive the party when signs of rigor mortis are evident for all to see: 5 states lost, two by-elections lost, a murder case running awry and suspect, billions lost by Khazana and GLCs, dirty tricks, money politics, blatant greed by its members, police brutality resulting in over a thousand deaths in police lockup over the years

However, there is an infinitesimal chance, if his next statement can hold any sincerity:

He said changes to be effected should also include making the party more people-friendly.

EXACTLY! Like having your police personnel stop harassing the rakyat at peaceful assemblies; like no more deaths while in police custody; and most of all GET RID OF THE ISA.

If you can do that there is a chance of resuscitating UMNO and I will not allow the monkey to slap you again.

So what is this monkey-slapping saga? Read on…….

There was once a hat-seller, named Hassan Albar who passed by a forest on his way back from the market. The weather was very hot and so he decided to take a nap under one of the trees, so he left his whole basket of hats by the side.


A few hours later, he woke up by some sounds. The next thing he realized was that all his hats were gone. He heard some monkeys on the tree and so he looked up. To his surprise, the tree was full of monkeys and they had taken all his hats.


The hat-seller, Hassan Albar, sat down and thought of how he could get the hats down. He started scratching his head. The next moment, he realized that the monkeys were doing the same action.


Next, he took down his own hat and saw the monkeys did exactly the same. An idea came to him, he took his hat and threw it on the floor and the monkeys did that too.


So he finally managed to get all his hats back.

If you think you have read this before….., read on!!!


Fifty years later, his grandson, named Syed Hamid (aka Si Botak –ISA Minister), also became a hat-seller and had heard this monkey story from his grandfather, Hassan Albar.

One day, just like his grandfather, he passed by the same forest, it was very hot, and he took a nap under the same tree and left the hats on the floor. He woke up and realized that all his hats were gone. Syed Hamid looked up and realized that the monkeys had taken all the hats. He remembered his grandfather's words, started scratching his head and the monkeys followed.

He took down his hat and fanned himself and again the monkeys followed. Now, very convinced of his grandfather' s idea, Syed Hamid threw his hat on the floor but to his surprise, the monkeys held on to all the hats.

Then one monkey climbed down the tree, grabbed the hat on the floor, gave Syed Hamid a tight slap and said,

"You think only you have a grandfather!"